why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
