why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
i drank out of a bidet.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
