it's too hot outside to masturbate.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
