I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
