We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
