i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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