You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
