To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize