This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize