why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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