it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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