No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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