Just cropdusted the office
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
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