Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Say something about gay babies.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
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