Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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