I'm going to jail i love you
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize