I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
