It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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