Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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