The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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