Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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