Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
