My nipple is on Facebook.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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