best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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