I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Randomize