Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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