You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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