I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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