I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I wish I could teleport
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
