Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
