Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
