You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
