ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize