My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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