god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
