drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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