nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I would fuck him just for his dog
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
