that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
