nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
