are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
