im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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