I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
You dont lie about slip and slides
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
