I want to have your abortion
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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