Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
