Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
His hands were made for my vagina.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Randomize
