How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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