There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
it's like heaven, but drunker
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
