The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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