i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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