I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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