i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize