So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
